Miss Bravarado

2012-01-12T23:24:00.002+08:00

Today I've regained that feeling of peace - where I learn that everything in the world is beautiful in itself, that you don't necessarily have to desire to change something always.

That peace or even happiness can be found with contentment, with hope, by believing that there is someone out there who cares.

Ganbarimasu.

風之花

Five hundred twenty-five thousand
Six hundred minutes,
Five hundred twenty-five thousand
Moments so dear.
Five hundred twenty-five thousand
Six hundred minutes
How do you measure, measure a year?

How about love?
How about love?
How about love? Measure in love

Seasons of love. Seasons of love.

Letting go, for now.

2011-12-25T15:57:00.002+08:00

It's so easy yet so hard.

Getting down to Earth

2011-08-09T11:20:00.002+08:00

For the longest time, I thought I knew what being down-to-Earth meant, but it is only when I decided to chase after my dreams to be part of the entertainment field did I realize that exactly what it means by building castles in the air with no foundation below them.

In any industry, but to me, particularly in entertainment, where the success stories are so hyped up, it is relatively easy to daydream but more challenging to pull yourself back to reality and to take action towards your goal.

No matter the number of years you set for yourself to succeed in your dream career, or in an industry, the reality is, success does not come overnight. It might take longer than the time you deemed it required. In my case, the only way to let myself move on and enjoy the process is to stop simply dreaming, wake up, and take action toward it step by step, and see where, and who, in 5 years, I will become.

Building castles in the air makes you insecure. It makes you wonder if you're just living in a fantasy, and whether you'll ever live that fantasy. Coming back down to Earth ensures that you live it out, and it is always reality, even if it isn't what you imagined. And reality is what's best.

2011-07-03T17:20:00.002+08:00

I realised once again today the importance of living for myself,
and how no one else holds the consequences I face but me.

The long forgotten philosophy

2011-05-03T22:59:00.001+08:00

And now remembered:

If you measure your life and your worth by how much you are given by others, you will never be fulfilled or happy.
Instead, think of life and your worth as how much you give into it, and there'll always be more than enough things to be thankful for, especially those 'little but big' extras.

2011-04-18T09:22:00.001+08:00

Creating a story takes imagination.
It takes purpose.
It takes courage.

And now I've rationalized and crapped too much and should just get around to doing it. :P

2011-03-29T14:38:00.003+08:00

ROCKING OUTTA IT. :P

Rewatched School of Rock yesterday.
Watch out, the man. xDD
Ultimately, it's about being you, whoever you are, and breaking out of 'socially acceptable'.

Dewey: Rock ain't about doing things perfect.
Who can tell me what it's really about ?

Leonard: Sticking it to The Man ?

Dewey: Yes ! But you can't just say it, man.
You gotta feel it in your blood and guts.
If you wanna rock, you gotta break the rules.

2011-03-29T14:05:00.009+08:00

This time I've learnt that you should never do things solely because "This is my job/what people taking on my career do - they learn many languages, they need to know about beers, wines and spirits, they have to be grounded."

What I've believed is true. There are too many types of personalities in any occupation to come up with a set stereotype. The fact is, if you enjoy what you do, you belong to that industry. It isn't work for you, and time passes fast enough. If you're merely conforming or attributing everything to where you come from or what you are, then we will all become mere representation of the stereotypes. Loving what you do is the first step to proving that something different and fresh is possible and to being that something different and fresh. And it's just natural.

Thus, from now on, instead of over-fretting, I want to do things that truly interest me, that I am keen on. Not due to anything else.

I start now.

Sometimes in life we think about our purpose, what we are living for.
Perhaps, it's simply about who we live for.

The more layers that you create for protection, the more the walls become insurmountable.

Interesting Discovery

2011-02-02T01:49:00.003+08:00

Interesting Discovery I made today.

It'll be interesting to look back at this in 10 years' time.

Lesson #1

2010-11-12T01:30:00.000+08:00

How to be yourself.

Bookworm Me

2010-10-13T21:53:00.005+08:00

A total bookworm now. :) Over-visiting bookstores after work and buying books. Something to do with a random need to buy something that defines a fulfilling life. Tsk tsk, since I'd be going to Maldives soon.

& Gleek.

And it's time to face reality.

Sometimes you look around at others' stories and you realise that you don't deserve self-pity. And at other times they inspire you, to let you know that it's never too late to pick something up, to learn something or to do something you've always wanted to do but thought you were never given a chance to.

And once again, I would like to remind myself one thing - not to leave (O)SIP feeling like the way I felt when it started - lost. Go all out, make all the mistakes I can make and allow myself to mess up. Only then can I make the right judgement and come to enjoy it or give myself a pat on the back about it.

Frankly, I'm not too sure. :P

2010-09-18T21:00:00.003+08:00

There is only one person who could ever make you happy, and that person is you.
David Burns, Intimate Connections

You must want yourself to be happy. :) No one else can will it for you.

And whilst this past 3 years or so (the toughest and yet most memorable 3 years of my life) have taught me to perhaps be less idealistic, but it has also taught me to hope and to improve. I look forward to the day I can balance that.

Where I can accept all of who I am and that I'm not who I'm not. :)

Reflect & move on

2010-08-03T23:26:00.003+08:00

I think I've survived enough angst and over-dramatism from myself this semester. (Sounds like my sarcasm is coming up again, but I shall think for the better xDD)

Recently, the thought of writing stories keeps popping up in my head, but I consistently claim to myself that I don't have the time. Perhaps, compared to other interests I have this must be one of the most mild and executable ones.

Going round in circles again.

Basically, whilst I can't deny that I'm not perfect, it doesn't mean I'm not any good. And I'm not ashamed to convince myself of that. The past semester hasn't been easy, but it has been plagued more by my lack of confidence and my inability to give myself and others a chance more than anything else.

Utimately, when it comes to relationships, isn't it about simply being genuine? Even though it sounds like what an idealist would say, but rather than believing that something that is fake, masked and covered up is reality, why not otherwise?

And even trying to live up to this value is a form of joy in itself.

I do not think or know whether I'd ever be my old self again, but I think what truly matters is consistantly finding a way to like the current me, to see my joy and pain, to see what makes me loveable or annoying. :P And the same applies for others, even if they change across time.

And thus, the key is simply to hold on to this moment, dearly enough, to want it to be the best, to want to forgive, to want to forget and to want to present yourself with another opportunity. It means to find meaning in what you do and what you want in your life and not asking your life to find its own meaning (Yes, apparently it does sound ridiculous, doesn't it?)

In a couple of years' time I might be 'older and wiser' or otherwise, and there can be certain things I would like to hold on to, and whether I want to shake these things off or otherwise, they will stick with me through life. I decide what stays and what is let go. :)

Take courage

2010-07-22T22:39:00.006+08:00

Who am I?

That must be the question that I had wanted to ask myself for so long.

Am I 3 years old, or have I truly lived the amount of years since I was born?

When someone changes, does she become completely reborn?

Then again, does it really matter whether or not I know the answer, so long as I'm happy with the way I am now?

I never look back, darling! It distracts from the now.
- The Incredibles

Does not looking back help in facing the present?

Haha, I used to be able to offer myself answers. I need to get around to doing that and stop throwing the questions.

More questions just equates fruitless attempts at escaping.

Take courage.

There are more important things in life than whining, than doing for the sake of doing, and loving for the sake of loving.

Take courage to admit that deep down inside, there is a better purpose for it, and in the end, what truly matters is:

Enjoy it.

sense of hearing

2010-07-07T00:09:00.002+08:00

We tend to twist what we hear
into what we would like to hear
or fear hearing.

When & How can we hear something for what it is?

Music, the breeze and raindrops.

But then again, isn't it part and parcel of life?

Santa Monica

2010-06-10T23:09:00.001+08:00

In Santa Monica, in the wintertime,
The lazy streets so undemanding
I walk into the crowd
In Santa Monica, you get your coffee from
The coolest places on the promenade
Where people dress just so
Beauty so unavoidable, everywhere you turn
It's there.
I sit and wonder what am I doing here?

But on the telephone line I am anyone
I am anything I want to be.
I could be a super model or Norman Mailer
And you wouldn't know the difference
Or would you?

In Santa Monica, all the people got modern names
Like Jake or Mandy
And modern bodies too
In Santa Monica, on the boulevard,
You'll have to dodge those in-line skaters
Or they'll knock you down
I never felt so lonely,
Never felt so out of place
I never wanted something more than this

But on the telephone line I am anyone
I am anything I want to be
I could be a super model or Norman Mailer
And you wouldn't know the difference
On the telephone line, I am any height
I am any age I want to be
I could be a caped crusader, or space invader
And you wouldn't know the difference
Or would you?

Or would you?

But on the telephone line I am anyone
I am anything I want to be
I could be a super model or Norman Mailer
And you wouldn't know the difference
On the telephone line, I am any height
I am any age I want to be
I could be a caped crusader, or space invader
And you wouldn't know the difference
Or would you?

Santa Monica - Savage Garden

2010-06-03T21:27:00.002+08:00

Everything has a price. You must be willing to put in the effort.

What matters in the end is that you love yourself and enjoy what you're doing.
It's time to take a positive stance and make it happen no matter what.

Let go.

Celebrate yourself.

2010-06-03T21:01:00.003+08:00

No one else is going to teach you to love and take care of yourself if you don't learn to do it.

Learn to celebrate yourself. If you see your weakness always, you'll never be able to use your strengths to break out of them and to make the right decisions, to do the right things.

Failure signifies room for improvement.
It is through failures that you motivate yourself to do more.
Besides learning how to succeed and to be comfortable with success, one must learn how to fail.

Life can be very simple or very complex.
When there's something worth celebrating, just show the joy. When there's something to sob about, cry your guts out.

I thought that was what I celebrated about myself.

Be brutally honest with myself, even if it's gonna hurt.
What am I afraid of?
Does it really matter in the end?

Why not just let it happen naturally, and handle what I can, and share what I can't?

Repost: Thank you.

2010-06-02T23:41:00.001+08:00

Thank you (so much).

Logic & Feelings

2010-05-23T23:43:00.003+08:00

This is why we need a mix & balance of reason and feelings.

You can reason about how much something may mean to someone, and even attempt to convince yourself how it would be just as important to you if you apply it to your life, but you would probably not ever be able to agree with it until you can feel it, to admit that you are wrong and that's when start being honest with yourself.

To Prove

2010-04-25T00:20:00.000+08:00

Whether it's still a long way to go for me to figure out how to make decisions for myself and what exactly I want, I think I should start right now.

Have stuck many labels on myself.
Claims to know what I want but is wavering.
Knows what I might enjoy more but also what I will regret having given up.
Stubbornly trying to prove something.

Haha, maybe this brings me to the question:

How far does one go to prove something?

Does it need to be proven in the first place?

Playlist

2010-04-19T21:47:00.003+08:00

Playlist

1. Fly Away - 梁静茹
2. 崇拜你 - 刘力扬
3. My Life Would Suck Without You - Glee Version
4. That's What I'm Here For - Jason Castro

Black, White and Grey

2010-04-18T11:35:00.003+08:00

Not everything in life is Black and White, and you don't pretend to cross over to the grey and then insist that by doing so, the result will then be positive. Crossing to the grey area only serves to make you more satisfied with yourself, though not necessarily with the situation.

I wonder...

2010-04-13T11:19:00.001+08:00

How much longer I should/can suppress this.

Too much.

2010-04-07T14:04:00.011+08:00

The virtual world is becoming completely mad.

Everything (including commercial products and the media) is becoming so virtual community, interactive, discussion- and participation- based ('share your thoughts', 'share your opinion', 'have a slice of this') that I can't even find simple information. o.o

Could it be that everything is being overdone and complicated?

I dread to think the kind of virtual world in the future where I might have to piece everyone's opinions about something in a forum so as to get its basic information. Instead of being a place for additional discussion or play a supportive role, such forums and 'free media' like platforms will serve as the actual, information retrieval platform and as an official marketing media. -_-

Social media is a very successful personal platform. But marketing so many official and commercial websites toward that direction and making them almost separate interactive platforms of their own is making me as the user wear out. I need somewhere where I can find some cold, hard facts that are straightforward and doesn't ask for your opinion at every turn.

2010-03-31T18:27:00.005+08:00

The way I feel about music is that there is no right and wrong. Only true and false.

- Fiona Apple

It's a matter of fitting your current practices to fit the event and the individual. See, what's good for you might not be worth a darn for the next guy.

- Bill Bowerman

There is no such thing as right and wrong, there's just popular opinion.

- Jeffrey Goines

It's been a long journey...

2010-03-31T17:59:00.002+08:00

It has truly been a long journey indeed. Now into the holidays, it has dawned on me for quite some time that I'll be into my 3rd and final year soon, into the last hoard of projects, into the internship that I hope to become more excited than worried about. Or rather, I'm currently still worried and hesistant with regards to the internship. I wonder if it's just a sign of my lack of courage to face what I think I cannot succeed in, whether it's with regards to this internship or this industry. How interesting is this journey called life (and yes, I sound dramatic like heck, but to the heck with that) that I was so persistent, and is still persistent with wanting to make it in this industry because it is everything that is the complete opposite of me.

Sometimes I wonder what's the difference between an old and new self. Is it change? A change in perception, perhaps even a change in personality? Because when one makes the same mistakes, is she the same old person? I admit I lack the conviction.

At times I wondered if I thought or did things differently from the rest of the world, but when I figured out the whole world was just about the same, it got me even more confused as to who I should be.

I have been shielding myself too much. Perhaps it's time to let go...

Christmas Post

2009-12-24T22:46:00.003+08:00

Feeling really high, and would like to say:

Merry Christmas to the world! :)

Yes, I just came to the realization of this (that it was Christmas Eve) just 1 hr ago (at about 9:00pm). I knew it was Christmas season, but not the 24th. Amazing, isn't it? :) Haha, the sarcasm. It was more of like an intended runaway from everything else but the work I'm supposed to do due to various reasons, but yet not as pathetic as it seems. So, yes, I am having no life in that terms and I am going to create one now.

Though what has marked this Christmas special is that I just had a long thought on nearly everything in my life, analysed it honestly with myself from a third party perspective, and recognised many things again. That in life, many things have to be viewed from another perspective - when you're angry, you have to look beyond blaming others and their mistakes, when you're happy or even sad, you have to look beyond just that moment itself for the hidden message.

I have blamed the past, many, many times for my failures. And not really liked myself for doing it. The past did affect and shape the boundaries of the way I'm acting now, but I need to break out of these past expectations and experiences to create myself.

So, yes, I am selfish, arrogant, optimistic, unrealistic, kind, smart, capable, mature, childish, organised, lucky and I am human. It's about perception. Sometimes, we need to look beyond the labels, and the things that we go through, and create ourselves, to let our choices define who we are.

Inspiration

2009-10-10T23:00:00.001+08:00

Some random thoughts after a conversation with my aunt on the phone.

1) Talk to my parents when I'm down.
2) Don't compete, a passing grade is also an achievement. Doing my best does not equate killing myself over schoolwork.
3) Embrace nature.
4) Learn to laugh in the face of adversity.
5) Learn to take the right breaks.
6) Health is wealth.
7) Buy a cactus?

I want to change.

2009-10-09T19:54:00.032+08:00

Here is the point of time where I can see things clear, that I am resisting any form of change that will benefit myself. I.e. I am not practicing self-love. And here is the point of time where I would like to tell myself, I WANT TO CHANGE, because only by changing and admitting where I stand, loving myself for who I am & what I do can I take charge of my life and where it's going, and simply be happy.

This kind of "heart is dead" and "can't be bothered" syndrome happened for many holidays before now, where I just wanted to "rot my life away" before the television. When I have work, I get upset because I start getting worried that I'm too busy and have no time for myself, and when I don't have work, I start getting worried that I have no life and find work for myself. Then I just want to sit before the TV and not reflect. (i.e. the stage of stagnation and lack of improvement.)

I know very well that if I continue like this, next semester will be set for disaster. I will not be able to enjoy whatever I'm doing, and just do what's required - homework, projects & CYA- like a monotone robot workaholic.

Here's my thoughts on how I am doing things & how I would like to change from NOW:

#1: I need a memo system. I need to know what I've been doing today and what I will be doing tomorrow. i.e. I need reflection and planning, and goals and direction. All the big words. O_O I will also purchase a calendar for each month's preview. Buawhahaha.

#2: I am working like a monotone robot with no momentum. I'm simply doing things because they are available for me to do. Like watching TV and sleeping on the bus instead of reflecting. Like finding CYA things to do at the wrong time. This will seriously affecting the stress I will face over my projects and assignments in the future. I need to know what is important. I need to be prioritizing & doing things at the right time or with the least (i.e. efficient) effort.

#3: I do not need the television or the computer or facebook, etc, etc for extended periods of my day. These are my tools, not my time masters. I need to grab myself out of the television fantasy world (in the context of dramas) and focus on my much more interesting life that I have a responsibility for. And of which I am living in and experiencing.

#4: I will learn to face myself and reality, even when I'm carrying an umbrella in a sheltered school concourse. I recognise that facing reality is the only way to solving problems and only by admitting my current status, right or wrong, can I learn something from the process.

#5: I will accept that I am always learning and growing. I will not be easily frustrated even when I make the same mistake, but treat myself with patience as much as firmness. I will learn to accept new methods of doing things, and tell myself, "Well, I'm at the transition stage (growing), so no harm giving things (e.g. new learning methods) a try". i.e. I will accept new experiences and understand that I can do so while staying true to myself.

#6: I will not be big headed. Looking back, I can tell myself that one of my largest failures was my overconfidence. Over the semesters, I learnt to let what my tutors and friends expect of me become what I expect of myself but also started to expect from myself what I thought they expected of me. I expected my projects and grades to be above average, expected myself to set the benchmark. Of course, ever since SSM and Sem 2.1 provided a wake up call, everything becomes painfully clear.

#7: I was never the best and I don't need to be. I don't want to enter into all the hulaboo (ok, checked google, it's hullabaloo -_-) of competition. My purpose in TP is to enjoy my 3 years of learning, so I have 1 1/2 years left, and boy, am I going to enjoy it! I don't want my knowledge to become a weapon that I use to climb all over others and self-degrade or allow others to do the same. This knowledge will be of help to me in my life at a point or another. I would like to study out of personal interest, out of treasuring the moment.

#8: Grades are a goal, not a destination, definitely not a weapon. They are figures. But I cannot deny that I did care and I might care in the future, whether for personal satisfaction or because of societal expectations. But what I would like myself to know is that ultimately, (if I had the courage to let go during SSM), the happiness of learning and the satisfaction of challenging myself will top the number of As or Zs that I can get on my cert.

#9: Confidence comes from knowing exactly what I'm doing & where I'm heading. Confidence does not come from being so aware of what others think of me, but recognizing the more important issues ahead. After all, majority of the time people who judge me don't know me well. Confidence is about staying true to oneself no matter what others think. And yes, it's also about being prepared.

#10: I need to put my heart into anything I do; to challenge myself. I want to be a knowledgeable, confident SR, then I need to brush up on my airport knowledge. I want to balance ITB Asia with schoolwork, then I need to figure out how to catch up on the first week of school. If I want to pick up swimming and obtain a NASSA bronze, I need effort. If I would like to brush up on my languages, I need to be practicing. Things don't fall from the sky (like "Millions").

#11: Understand my limits. Instead of constantly trying to pursue new frontiers (new CCAs, new events, whatsnot), I need to understand where I stand now. I have personal well-being & interests, my closed ones and friends, learning and CYA in priority. Only when I am juggling the current amount of fruits well can I pluck more off the tree.

#12: Learn how to enjoy being alone and do things on my own so I can become independent. But never forget that there are always wonderful helping hands (my dearest family & friends). :D The world is a team. Being independent is a beauty, but not when it becomes self-segregation and bao-ga-liao. Participation is key to healthy partnership. Listen attentively to what others in the team have to contribute.

Learn to love myself and the things I do, the paths I've chosen. Learn to appreciate that no matter how I fall, I can always learn from the experience.

Everything presents itself as a challenge. Like what was mentioned in I Not Stupid, instead of fearing and running away from Mathematics, one should seek to make friends with it, understand it from inside out and then "defeat it".

Life is never perfect.

2009-09-16T11:15:00.007+08:00

Reporting, reporting, we are now 3 weeks into the holidays. This is the period of time where I continue to look back at the past semester, flipping through each entry, of how I had failed to let go of certain imperfections but had later come to accept them, and the process of looking back is interesting. I've had so many misses, and yet later on, when I've came to accept them, they become hits.

What I've come to learn, time and time again (and this time is no exception), is in short, to carry out my self worth to love myself and others, and to be grateful for the many things I have and do not have in life. I am grateful for being able to enter TP to follow my dreams and to be grateful for my family and dearest close friends. I am grateful for being able to live and love. Being grateful makes a lot of things clearer and simpler, because one complains less and compares less. The grass is not necessarily greener on the other end, and even if it is, I can't be bothered, because what I have here is sweet enough.

Therefore, I will go all out to experience what life has to offer, give in my very best in what I do, and enjoy doing what I do. :)

I believe in myself.

Winners Are People Like You

Winners take chances
Like everyone else, they fear failing, but they refuse to let fear control them.

Winners don’t give up.
When life gets rough, they hang in until the going gets better.

Winners are flexible.
They realise there is more than one way and are willing to try others.

Winners know they are not perfect.
They respect their weaknesses while making the most of their strengths.

Winners fall, but they don’t stay down.
They stubbornly refuse to let a fall keep them from climbing.

Winners don’t blame fate for their failures nor luck for their successes.
Winners accept responsibility for their lives.

Winners are positive thinkers who see good in all things.
From the ordinary, they make the extraordinary.

Winners believe in the path they have chosen even when it’s hard, even when others can’t see where they are going.

Winners are patient.
They know a goal is only as worthy as the effort that’s required to achieve it.

Winners are people like you.
They make this world a better place to be.

- Nancye Sims (Source)

Life - through a backpack.

2009-08-13T21:57:00.012+08:00

I promised myself not too be too explicit, because I don't need to whoosh out all my feelings in black and white to be honest with myself. Because if I placed how I felt for the past semester in words, I will censor my own blog. O.O

Looking back at this past semester, saying that I'm proud of what I've done with my life would be a lie. Saying that I'm not proud of it will be discouraging and politically incorrect. Stating that I "don't know what I'm doing" is quite correct. Stating that I'm doing something about it is quite incorrect.

And that, ends my 4 line introduction of Semester 2.1. Did I just blog about challenging it a few months ago?

Putting aside the sarcasm and everything else, it's become clear (thanks to a friend) that I am upset because I cannot meet up to my personal expectations. The past semester has been nothing short of drama, and I know I am responsible for it.

Let's start with SSM. I walked in expecting myself to exceed expectations, as I have done with theoretical classes. In Year 1, I was proud to call myself a mugger, but now I want to be something else. I want to also excel in practical aspects of this industry, because that's my goal - to become a skilled service personnel. I was sorely disappointed.

Throughout the past semester, I've come to be bothered about grades, about impressions, about all sorts of things that I have not even been working hard for.

When I related my dilemma to my dear friend today, she told myself something that perhaps, I've been trying hard to run away from for the past semester. The fact that you have to start somewhere to reach your goal. I put in the effort in Year 1 because I wanted to become a competent, well-trained service personnel and I saw my future in my hard work now. I enjoyed learning new things about this industry.

At SSM, everything, to me, went down the drain. It was as though I suddenly did not understand what I was fighting for, when I had to face the fact that I cannot meet up to my expectations, and I cannot reach even the bare minimum.

Ultimately, it's not about what happened in Year 1 but now. I have pulled myself together and spurred myself on during certain times for SSM, and I am thankful for the opportunities given for me to challenge myself, but I cannot say I enjoyed it as much as I would have if I were better at it.

Even if I don't like to admit it, I did my best. There were many times throughout this semester where I was surprised at my efforts and capacity for challenges, though I have to admit that this is one of the most emotional and tiring semesters for me.

It's truly easy to talk the walk and not walk the talk. But what I've re-learnt today that I had already woken up to (why is there deja vu?) after the turning point is that life is not all about placing your expectations and hopes in one basket. Life is multi-dimensional, and whether I like it or not, I cannot be perfect at everything I do. I am still young, and I am putting the weight of the world (at least, the weight of my adult life) on my shoulders.

I should never forget that there are dreams to chase after & goals to work hard for. And along the way, all the experiences that I go through and the difficulties I face are part of learning - more about myself, and more about the goal I'm after.

I would like to take this opportunity to pat myself on the back and pat all my course mates on the back too.

Because a familiar quote is well-written (and slightly edited):

"If you think of this world as a place intended simply for our happiness, you find it quite intolerable:
think of it as a place for learning and it's not so bad."
- CS Lewis

I remember reading on the 80%/20% rule on Strengths and Weaknesses that was refreshed in Marketing Lecture. We often spend 80% of our time working on our weaknesses that constitutes 20% of our personality. Today, during the Four Seasons talk, I recognised the fact that Mr Scott Woroch of Four Seasons Hotel did not start out with a strong background in hospitality, but he succeeded.

I must come to terms with myself that I truly do not have much of the skills and strength required for the industry at the moment, or even life skills in general with regards to the challenges I might face in the future, however, what I should be doing, and will be doing, is to appreciate my strengths, do the best I can with them, and work hard on my goal of who I want to be, that accentuates these strengths more than covering up the weaknesses.

Life is about finding the best in yourself and the situation you are in, and deciding where to go from here. It is about being confident, taking personal responsibility, and sometimes, not thinking or caring too much about what other people think. It's about giving my personal best in each moment for the things that matter, and it is and has always been about love.

It's actually refreshing that I'm finally bringing the meaning behind this word into my life again, because there are so many doubts I had that now seem very clear.

Finally, life is about humility. There is much I have to learn and open my mind up to. Life is not a destination, I will always been on the go.

Very much similiar to the travel industry, isn't it?

What do you think of: a burden or an adventure?

...Attitude to me is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than success, than what other people think, say or do. It is more important than appearance, gift, or skill. It will make or break a company...a church...a home.
The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day...I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you... we are in charge of our attitudes.
- Charles Swindoll

People don't care how much you know, until they know how much you care.
- Anonymous

Backpack Image from : Kata digital photo series backpacks

Shooting Star

2009-07-17T21:59:00.005+08:00

Firstly, a big thank you to Michelle & my family for listening to me, caring about me and supporting me all this while.

Next, thank you to myself for not (completely :P) giving up even during the most trying times this semester.

Thank you.

Summarising my emotions of the entire semester into one word would be: bittersweet. I lost my purpose of learning because I thought I saw no future in it (sounds exaggerated, but true). I'd come to a stage where I started to question how working hard to acquire theorotical knowledge would truly help me to excel in my work next time. I thought, idealistically, perhaps, that working hard would mean knowledge that I can use to excel in what I love doing - service.

This semester opened my eyes to many things, and thank you to Michelle for pointing them out. There is much more to life than superficial things like grades or how well I do during lessons, and life is a larger picture than what I could see. I found out what it truly means to make life a journey. I had been too caught up in reaching a destination that I forgot the purpose of what I was doing.

Perhaps this time I won't claim to know any answers, because I'm always learning from experience. All I know is that I can pick up skills anytime as much as I can put them aside, but the choices that I make for myself and what I do make the difference.

So, I would like to tell myself, I've worked hard for the past semester, and I deserve to acknowledge my efforts and be confident about myself. Now I know that each step of the way I will fall, and I will become strong. I can switch industries, I can change goals, but the constant that I will achieve is determination in doing the best and being the best I can be.

Ultimately, we are all the same. We need to become our own shooting star and the only constant we can bring along is the love we have for ourselves, our lives and others. Dreams are beautiful things that are never too late to achieve.

And I see a Shooting Star
Set apart from all the rest
While the other stars are standing still
She's on a quest
Every night this shooting star
Darts across the twilight sky
Cause she knows she doesn't quite fit in
And she's longing to know why

Recollection.

2009-06-20T16:19:00.009+08:00

It is rather interesting that after you stop doing something for a while, you may not know where to start, for example, this blog post.

The past term, I must say, has truly been a challenge. I admit I have fallen many times, and chose to stay fallen, because I had lost sight (or thought?) of who I was and where I was going or what I was doing at many points in time.

I admit, I found it hard to let go. Many a times I was so inclined, compelled, etc. to want to feel that sense of superiority and control that I lost myself. I couldn't concentrate on what I was supposed to learn in front of me, and started to play games of well, jealousy, greed and even politics?

No, it is not that serious. I'm still human, I can still admit it, thank you. xD

But I know how bad that is, especially since it makes me lose the power to well, even function positively. Giving an example: I'm constantly thinking about how to impress others, to be accepted that I forget why I used to volunteer to present my answers in class. I've started to think that it is because I wish to well, show-off, and is preventing myself from doing so.

The fact is, I did it because I felt I had done my work well, wanted to share it and to know what I can improve on.

Better keep yourself clean and bright. You are the window through which you must see the world.
- George Bernard Shaw

Because I could not accept myself for the way I was, because I tried to become someone I was not or to achieve things out of my control, I also viewed others in a negative light, and it forms a vicious cycle where I don't feel happy.

I constantly remind myself of the meaning behind taking care of myself before others, but I overdid it this semester. There is a fine line between selfishness and this, and it's all in the mind to overcome.

As the next term comes, I feel I'm in a much more stronger position to face it. I have untangled quite a number of my confusions and thoughts.

I realised that sometimes you don't need to know who you are. Many a times I hold on too much to who I am or who I define myself to be, and I find it difficult to change. The truth is, we are all being influenced by one another and learning from each other every day; we are all changing. Why hold on to something that isn't absolute? Ultimately, it is my attitude, the way I live my life and what I do, how I improve on the methods that I am using that makes the difference. Why the eagerness to fall into stereotypes?

For SSM the past term, many things have been easier said than done. I've been caught up with what my classmates and instructors thought of me, that I haven't been enjoying or learning. There was a point of time where I'd come to a conclusion that sometimes, learning (when you have a serious lack of prior experience) is not about enjoying and left it as it is. However, the fact was, I was moaning and feeling self-pity and holding myself back before I could even begin. Sure, weight is not my strength but what I had given up on was not just weight but also on putting my strengths to good use and myself as a person.

I confess I am still quite hesitant to face the next term, but I know I must get myself ready and I want to face it with good attitude. One thing I've learnt and I enjoy about this course and this industry is that nothing stops for you, and you realise too, that you cannot stop, not only because guests are waiting. It is also because life is waiting for you to sort out and get in order, to challenge your potential, and of course, to take better care of yourself.

Thank you

2009-06-01T23:06:00.013+08:00

If you would like to feel free, to enjoy, then give this moment the best that you've got, because the rest will take care of itself.

On a positive note, it's interesting how I am always (positively) forced to find who I am when exams (*cough* the Challenge) come(s). Because I have no one else and nothing else to use as an excuse for not living my life the way I should.

In short, I've discovered that under no condition am I to let go of who I am (yes, again xD), to cherish the moment and not take things too seriously, and to treasure those that are dear to me - family and friends.

Thank you for being the way you are, for your patience and kindness.
Thank you that we can all be ourselves in front of each other.

Emotions.

2009-05-15T19:03:00.002+08:00

I admire the old man who smiled at me,
and whom I ignored and walked away from,
but continued smiling to whatever was in front of him.

I am responsible for my life.

2009-04-26T16:15:00.005+08:00

To cut the long story short, the past week has been highly dramatic, and what exactly I told myself not to do in the post before the start of school I did - to be compellingly perfect. And when I really (really) fell short of my expectations during SSM (Service Skills Methodology = subject) earlier this week, I was to say the least, demoralised. And I was too easily demoralised. The truth is, no one else underestimated my passion and efforts more than myself.

Well, I now know that the above was scarier than (if I had been) scolded by the teachers, oh yesserie. I had too many expectations of myself for SSM and my first meeting with my classmates that I was disappointed at my performance. More than disappointed, I felt lost, because I knew I had stressed myself out so much in the preparation of SSM, because I knew I had lost sight of the purpose of SSM - to learn and to enjoy learning. Really, in the end, so what if I'm not the best bartender, the best server, the best anything or even not close to the best, as with the first session? If I have given my best effort within my abilities, and I graduate from this subject with a greater understanding of my strengths and weaknesses, that is more meaningful in every way.

The truth is that, I wasn't perfect, am not perfect and will never be. And I don't need to be. Because my purpose in life lies in love. My purpose of learning lies in simply enjoying learning more about myself and acquiring knowledge. My self-worth lies in my ability to love myself and others, and it starts with me.

So, with that, I will pick myself up. Bring on SSM, bring on the rest of the semester and its challenges. I will give in my very best with every step of learning on the way.

If I look beyond expectations, I will find a much greater strength and purpose in myself that was so simple to believe in but would have otherwise been hidden.

April Blues

2009-04-19T12:39:00.002+08:00

A comic that most Polytechnic students might relate to, that was found in the Lifestyle section of The Straits Times today.

For a close up look and perhaps, a good laugh, click here.

The purpose of this blog post is to encourage myself to be less compellingly perfect in the semester ahead. Enjoyment is the key.

Emotional Intelligence

2009-04-11T10:23:00.015+08:00

Enlightenment is not imagining figures of light but making the darkness conscious.
- Carl Gustav Jung

Towards the "end of the road", or in this case, the end of the holidays, I often look back and wonder how time flies. In a week's time, I'd be facing a challenging semester, and I'm glad to say that with my past experience (of Year 1 and working during this holidays), I'm ready for what's coming up. I'm ready to accept my weaknesses and work my strengths to its best, and ready to fall along the way and learn to pick myself up. After running away from my life for half a holiday, I'm ready to face it, take action towards my goals, and actually, for the first time in quite a while I'm not actually spewing meaningless words, but actually do know and dare to know what I'm living for.

I'm living for myself. What I live for doesn't have to be majestic, what I do doesn't have to be a legend. I simply should understand and accept myself, love myself and be myself.

After enlightenment, the laundry.
- Zen Proverb

And for now, I will stop acting beyond my age and blog like a normal teenager. xD
(Pardon the poor quality of the images, yet to adjust my phone settings.)

Taken at NYDC at Bugis last Friday, where Szehong and I sat outside, catching up on each other's lives. I was acting like an excited little girl when I saw its adorable customers - from Cookie Monster to Elmo to Eeyore.

And finally, I went for a Terrarium or Container Gardening course (kindly taught in TP) late last month, and here is the current state of my mini garden. Can you see the tiny oval-shaped? green leaf that's growing beside its humongous parter? That is the joy I wish to share, as it took nearly a week or longer to sprout, with all the old leaves having to die off first for the new leaves to adjust to the environment. :) Again, not the perfect terrarium, but I'm proud of it.

How I have grown.

2009-03-18T21:59:00.006+08:00

Interestingly, I'm not directly going to put across what I've written for the title, but instead just a collection of my thoughts of what has happened throughout these holidays. From searching for a job (I'm now working at New York New York) to planning out the things I wanted to do in the holidays, from preparation for Year 2.1 to studying language to entertainment, this has truly been an eventful and even head-hurting holiday, but definitely more fun and enjoyable then dreadful.

Perhaps I would first like to rewind to the past semester and start on academic matters. I have to admit that I have been more and more inclined to simply studying and not learning. I have become more inclined towards producing desirable grades (or at least, work that is up to my personal expectations) than attempting to learn (and perhaps, fail) in the process. Put it simply, before I came into HTM, the tourism materials that I had were reserved to the internet and the newspapers, and without fail, I would cut out relevant articles and source the STB website for tourism industry related information. Now I cut them and place them aside for futher reference. Perhaps they will rot in my file. xD

Now, having so much knowledge and information being perhaps, even fed to me, I'm not working hard on reading up myself any further. Or rather, what concerns me, as I have addressed in the previous post, is that I'm not applying the knowledge enough to constitute enough out of textbook/curriculum understanding. So, in the next semester, (or even from these holidays), I will hopefully be able to dish out time to work on applying my newfound knowledge like before. After all, as I acknowledged in the "O"s, the tourism industry is everchanging and a tourism student needs to be updated with the latest information.

Next, regarding work. Inititally, with the workload I thought I had to handle in the holidays (with SSM and language preparation and whatsnot for the next semester), my head was hurting with all the scheduling and planning and the lack of time that I presumed I had that I had a negative perception of starting work. Yes, enter my Type A personality (high stress levels, sense of time urgency, urge to do increasing amounts of work in lesser and lesser time), which I hope to tone down by enjoying learning instead of studying.

Back to work - when I just started my work stint, I was so upset by the lack of time that I had that all the benefits of working during the holidays flew out of the window (for exposure, preparation for SSM, spending the time). I seeked to regain my balance, and my mother could describe the drama of the first three days (in conjunction with the IT Fair 2009, which crowded the restaurant) - Physical pain on the first day because I was not used to the work load, Emotional pain on the 2nd day because I was holding surreal negative perspectives of my work due to a mood swing and Joy and laughter on the 3rd day because I had sorted out my thinking and yes, possibly too because of the lighter workload.

In retrospect, working at NYNY has been an eye opener for me. Though I knew that I had to handle such work load in SSM, I had never thought I could actually handle it in real life given that I don't do housework or heavy work at home. It made me realise that behind every service job (or perhaps, any job) requires much hard work that cannot be seen from the guests' perspective. It also snapped me back to reality - that I had to make an informed decision about the job/career I would like to pursue after my University education or even in SIP (internship at TP). It highlighted the importance of internship in allowing me to experience the actual job and of reading up related materials to my desired jobs. :) So, I finally got around to reading "The Sky is Crazy" by "Yvonne Lee" on the job of air stewardesses.

Here's to a fruitful holiday, and the increased workload of Semester 2.1 (sniff - 27 credit units), a (forecasted) semester of mistakes and one of learning.

Be Prepared.
- The Girl Guides Motto

-----------------------------
SSM = Service Skills Methodology

Go.

2009-03-07T09:43:00.004+08:00

Perhaps this is when I really find out the reason why I have felt so tired being my naggy, politically correct and motivated self for the past 6 months. Specifically, I have been experiencing low self-esteem, a high level of moaning or perhaps we should just cut it short with just one line: I've stopped loving myself.

Along the way, I've gotten many possible answers, one of them was that I didn't accept myself for who I am. And yes, Love is acceptance, as I've discovered. I was trying too much to be someone amazing that I wasn't, or couldn't be in the short time of a year I gave myself. Perhaps this had always been the case, from CSS to the past semester, when I've been struggling between finding out who I am and who I want to be.

Another, that I've obtained recently, was how I have forgotten that I am (shamelessly) a part miracle. In the past 6 months, I stopped believing in myself, appreciating myself for the fact that I had been strong enough to, step-by-step, rebuild my life and open myself up to the world and embrace reality and live life. 2 years ago I had been given a wake up call that I had done nothing at all with my entire 15 and a half years of my life and I am where I am today because of acceptance. Because I accepted reality and I accepted myself for who I am and because I stopped fantasizing of who I could be but instead what I could do.

So now, I will believe in myself again. I will remember that it has not been easy for me to grow to where I am. I will embrace new opportunities to grow, and remember along the way that I cannot give up no matter the difficulty, because I've experienced true difficulty and true strength.

Why Tourism.

2009-02-17T13:47:00.002+08:00

I want to put this up just in case I ask myself this a million times once again and not reach an answer.

Why Tourism:

To go places, to know places.

To help others.

To sell experiences, to give guests a most memorable time that suites their needs, and see them refreshed.

To immerse myself in the myriad of cultures & appreciate different people for who they are.

To live through such experiences with others and bond together with that connection of trust in a light-hearted working atmosphere.

To share my passion with both tourists and members of the community and involve them with my projects and my job
(Tourists to engage in community projects/Community to engage in tourism projects)

This was established even before I started on this course. Before I knew about Maslow's Hierachy of Needs, started on Geography of Travel & Tourism. Could it be the more I know, the less I think or feel? About what I can truly apply, about what really matters to me about this learning process and about the job that it leads up to the future.

An Angela 2009

2009-01-01T00:03:00.005+08:00

I thought that I could just simply watch 2008 go by and 2009 come like it was any other day, and I quite succeeded, though I couldn't help rewarding myself a little (with televison). Yes, my way of celebrating sounds rather mild and ridiculous, but I am happy, not simply because it is the coming of a new year, but because with the reopening of school I have regained my balance. And the formula was simple. Though I'd still have much to Jiayou in the new year, I am glad that I am at peace with myself. I was and am brave to face up to what has happened over the past year, and have emerged stronger. I live life exactly as it is, not too fast or too slow, not with an inexplicable sense of time urgency, but just 24 hours, 7 days. And I can live with it. :)

From the experiences in my past year, I am thankful that I have faced life, abet not to the bravest at every moment, I have stretched my potential to a point where I am very happy. Ureshii desu.

I've also come to recognise that improving myself is a process. It includes rewards and mistakes and by facing them as they are I can triumph over them and become the superwoman of myself.

May we appreciate how precious it is just to live,
and live each day by simply being ourselves.

For no matter what I am, with my strengths and my faults,
I have family and friends who simply just love me for who I am.
I am not just traits, but a person and the only me in the world.

Happy 2009.

Weary.

2008-11-24T17:19:00.004+08:00

As I am a typical teenager, allow me to show angst and confusion for once (or even twice, or more times, hehe).

I penned all of my tiredness into this half song half poem that took me the least time to write. And now I should be off to do my homework before everything piles up on me and I write more similar songs. xDD

Weary

Should I be weary?
How shall I nurse my weary heart?
Sure, I could be over reacting
but there must be some reason
there must be something
that’s making me feel

So Weary
So Wary
Like my heart is constantly being torn apart
and then pieced

So Weary
So Worried
I may be over reacting
but tell me how to overcome this

Emotions
Entangled inside of me
No matter how much how much
I tell myself
I must stay strong
Another day brings me down
Another sad turn comes around
So what is that
So what is it I’m supposed to do

Who am I supposed to be
Oh~ Someone else but me?
Why, I can feel my weary heartbeat

Is it so so so difficult to be me?
Who else shall I be?
Just mismatch me

Oh ~ Everyday, someone else but me
Who am I supposed to be

Is it that difficult to be me…

Quote to Thoughts

2008-09-29T13:47:00.009+08:00

The best way to make your dreams come true is to wake up.
- Paul Valery

Sometimes I try too hard to attain something less beyond my control or more impractical to *cough* satisfy more ambitious desires, perhaps? Or rather, I had the confidence that I could carry my dreams and ideals out, and I still do, but I should start from something or someone that makes it more achievable, i.e. myself.

It's so easy to put such thoughts into words and more difficult to carry it out. At times when we feel so happy thinking of a more perhaps recognised or just a goal that we feel gives us a great sense of achievement we become indifferent to the more fundamental or basic of our needs.

In other words, one part of me feels that I need to grow up first before I get big dreams done. To take things slowly. But another part of me feels I should experience to grow and learn along the way. Yet many a times I fail to carry out that experience properly and it seems like I'm setting a stage, with much reservation with regards to my actions and my thoughts. I don't carry the proper learning heart to really go all out, bruises and all. On top of that, sometimes I want to do so much at once that I'm tired, exhausted and "can't be bothered".

Perhaps this is meant to be a phase of many contradictions. Like the lemon meringue pie I've been in charge of baking and preparing since yesterday. Today it tastes fine, but it is a soggy runny mess VS the true lemon meringue pie. I saw the lack of confidence in myself - for when my parents encouraged me regarding my work (or rather, the work with muchos help from my brother), I was like HAH. I could have done much better. This isn't even anything.

And then it is at times I wonder whether I should continue to be so harsh with myself or encourage myself for smaller, probably more substandard achievements. When I get so harsh, it feels so easy to just simply give up. Therefore I shan't. This is my first attempt and it may not be the perfect meringue pie but it's my blood (ok, none), tears (inside me) and sweat (nevermind).

It isn't what you have, or who you are, or where you are, or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It is what you think about (it that matters).
- Dale Carnegie

I keep trying to consciously act like who I am, but perhaps I've never wondered: if I truly believe in who I am, I don't have to act. I can be naturally confident.

I think it's interesting - the contrasts I've experienced this past year whilst growing up. At times my actions and emotions are so dependent on others and other times I'm independent, motivated and solo-minded like no one or nothing can stop me. I wouldn't let anyone or even any physical thing affect my emotions. (i.e. no lucky charms, etc)

Though I may feel lost sometimes, I've also learnt about things that never change no matter how much I attempt to change myself and try to look at things in different ways - and one of them is that life is a journey to learn. And I must continue to learn my way through and enjoy the moments on the way. Perhaps the key is to let go, think simple and be content.

Even when faced with odds,
no matter how weak we feel,
how much we feel like giving up,
be it soaking in the past,
or running away from the present,
strong and positive is the way to go,

because things aren't going to change for us,
because therein lies the beauty of life,
because therein lies the beauty of love,
because there's a future waiting for us.

Because it doesn't matter how long you live, or how you die, but how you live your life.

To Share

2008-09-21T11:03:00.009+08:00

I attended the "Only Human" event at Raffles Hotel yesterday, organised by Audible Hearts and would like to share something beautiful with everyone: photos of my (selected) entry into the My Philosophy in Life activity that was part of the display at the event. To be able to share something that is special to me on such a relevant and practical platform makes me feel very proud and extremely happy. Thank you very much for the team at Audible Hearts (and to myself for pushing myself to enter :P) for making this happen.

So here they are:

The display of selected entries at the event - with my entry circled in red. :)

One of the proudest moments of my life - seeing my name on my entry. :)

Whilst sharing my happiness, I would also like to share my philosophy of life: Love. LD
Enjoy. :)

Why Love?

Because Love encompasses everything around us - our loved ones, strangers, ourselves.
Because Love is the closest thing we have to magic. (Aquamarine the Movie)

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves."-- 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (The Holy Bible)

Awaken.

2008-09-14T15:17:00.005+08:00

I wonder when I can be a little powerhouse - to accomplish the fufilling life with grace, with wit, with strength, with mind and with heart.

And if I continue to wonder here, I'm never going to get it done.
In other words, it hit me very very strongly that I'm not going all out to get anything done. Sure, I'm not aiming to be world president or a prominent figure (I don't think that should be anybody's aim, actually) or be the leader and the respected figure of everything. That sounds attractive somewhat but it's not me or what I want in life.

All I want is for all my purposes to travel from the heart and to enjoy being and developing who I am. If I'm a leader that can help others, so be it. If I'm a follower that can help others, so be it.

Ultimately, I want to be at the comfortable position that I can give my best.

In life from the big picture, there are big roles and bit roles.
In my life, I take center stage, frontline and go all out as the star.
I go wherever I take myself, to be happy. :)

Thus, in I made a daring decision and signed up for the Certificate Programme, that is, to take 4 allocated CDS or Cross-Disclipinary Subjects outside of my usually HTM curriculum (instead of the min of 3) and will continue to pursue other CDS of interests after I accomplish this.

I like its focus on my topics of interest, and that if I do get into my first or second choices - Cross-Cultural Studies/Language & Culture, it will really equip me with the skills I need for my future job that I am looking for. As my mum always says, "Opportunities are given to those who are well-prepared". And I value opportunities for exposure and for giving.

In life, there are choices to be made.
You make one that suits you best and you don't look back.
In fact, enjoy it.

- Love, Angela. xDD

The Peak after The Trough

2008-09-09T10:24:00.012+08:00

"Just be you, 'cos life's too short to be anybody else." - Step Up 2 : The Streets

Wooh, yes, I'm ready to collect all my thoughts into a long post.

Firstly, Understanding Others. Usually when you look at people and situations from a third-party perspective or not so much the situation but the person's personalities, you understand that person better and are less likely to be emotionally tangled. That's what I was doing yesterday, going through the many incidents in TP, some that seemed so difficult to forget, and yet when I placed myself in the shoes of others, acknowledging we all have strengths and weaknesses, everything is much clearer and simpler.

The past few months have been frankly, quite crappish times with challenge after challenge coming in and it seemed as though sometimes the examinations were the least of my worries. o.o xD I mean, at least I had something to think about when I studied. But as it always goes, after the storm comes the calm and I'm ready for Sem 2 to bring it on (with all the subjects I prefer, hehe. :P)

Sometimes, I wonder, how easy is it to be myself? These past months have set the most difficult challenges - of whether I can stand true to my beliefs and values. (Sounds very chim, I know.) And I'm pretty proud of myself though I can't say I succeeded in bringing across my thoughts 100% of the time. And that is why the journey to understand oneself is never ending. I need to understand what I'm thinking, whether it is an actual part of what I stand for and to piece it into words so I can explain it to others. That way, I can be confident and exactly sure that what I convey represents who I am.

There are also times where I can't seem to let go of being serious and keep wanting things to constantly be very "in control" - sorry to my friends who have been constantly victimised by me. xDD In life, there are times where we need to let go completely and just have fun, yes, but perhaps I was rather guilty that I had been losing control over my life for the past few months and tend to want to get very serious at times where everyone is more laid-back, which are the wrong times.

Okay, now it's spinning so chim out of control. xDD

In short, I still have much to do to be where I want to be - myself and spreading the love. :)

And I do not define love as BGR (only), thank you very much. I also regard it as compassion and altruism towards myself and others.

And I'd need strong discipline and time management for Semester 2. I will go all out to balance my studies and the life I want. And maybe I should redifine what kind of life I want a little to see if I'm trying to do too many things at once. Anyways, go go to me! :D

Hmm...

2008-09-03T22:21:00.004+08:00

I plan to work on many personal projects for this holidays, but there's one that the result will be shared amongst my friends...

Which will remain a secret till then, with this very very sneak preview (heh heh).

Thoughts.

2008-08-17T17:29:00.002+08:00

I'm supposed to be studying, yes, but as I research I can't help but think: there's so much going on.

Just look at this:

The Beijing Olympics is ongoing. Next month we'll have our inagural Formula One Singtel Singapore Grand Prix. Next year we'll have the Marina Bay Sands and it's only the start of what's going to dot the entire Marina Bay landscape. 2010 we'll have Resorts World at Sentosa AND YOG 2010. The Sports Hub will launch in 2011. Then we'll have the London 2012 Olympics.

With so much happening, sometimes when you view it in such a macro view you can't help thinking both a quote from the movie "Two Weeks Notice": "It's pretty amazing what dreams and lots of money can do." and wondering if I'm part of all the excitement.

But I guess, I'm contended to allow it to be part of my life in some way...

Watching the Beijing Olympics
Learning about Swimming Strokes
Learning about Swimmers o.o (it's inevitable)
Learning about Singapore's historic win over SK for Silver (possible Gold)
Perhaps going to Universal Studios Singapore
Perhaps volunteering at YOG 2010
Perhaps watching swimming events all over again
Perhaps holidaying at my own country's island
But then, perhaps. ;)

明天如何谁知道
命运之前我太渺小

咖啡.香.

Growing Strong

2008-08-09T12:17:00.008+08:00

Happy 43rd Birthday Singapore! :D

Though my title also reflects Singapore as a nation, it more of reflects what I am now. The past weeks were full of challenges, with all the crammed project deadlines making everyone tired and stressed, but I'm still here and alive.

An interesting look back at my past year:

Just a year ago, I wouldn't have gone to an interview even if you killed me (well, in the extreme sense).

A year on, I've gone to quite a number of interviews and each one of them, to me, were a success because I was able to voice out exactly who I am and what I am able to give. I was confident about myself.

Having such confidence and perception of interviews as a challenge that can be enjoyable would have seemed so far away, probably taking an entire lifetime, but all it took was a year.

I'm proud of myself for that. :) I may still not produce the best interviews, but I treasure each one for allowing me to be able to understand more about myself from them.

This is just something that hit me because I went for my Changi Youth Ambassador interview yesterday. :)

Sometimes, the goals and the dreams that seem so far away are actually close enough, if only one is focused on them. There are many ways to look at failure and if we take it at another perspective:

Failure is a thin line away from success.

Wish You Were Here - Taiwan Trip Part 1: Photolog

2008-07-05T20:45:00.004+08:00

Flight: On board China Airlines

Movie List:
Definitely, Maybe
Penelope

I enjoyed both movies very much. Definitely, Maybe showed me a lot about love that I was now mature enough to handle and understand, whereas Penelope was a surprisingly simple yet beautiful mordern fairytale plot that was both great fun and hold much of the values I cherish.

Day 1: Taipei 101

Ticket Counter (to buy tickets to the observatory):

These cute characters that lined the walls are Damper Babies (Yes, I know some people replace the "D" with "P" xD) and look just like the tower: simple, playfully yet sleekly adorable. Cool, cute and fun.

A magical walkway on the way to see the Wind Damper (what balances the tower when it vibrates due to natural disasters/violent wind movements - See Wikipedia Article). Somewhat like walking on the clouds, eh? Though we were so busy taking photos we didn't really notice it was so.

From the Observatory:

The sky cafe, where I tasted Green Apple Ice Cream (Movenpick) for the first time in my life... Was actually more sour than sweet, but admist its mordern yet playful surroundings (the Observatory) and with my holidaying mood, it turned out to be a great experience.

Near the souvenir shop, there's this interesting station where you can mail your postcards (there seems to be chops as stamps too) into 3 boxes, namely To Family, To Friends and To My Love

The observatory tower also displayed works of art from various artists, and the re-introduction of this work of art "Love" striked me in a way an art piece hasn't done before and it itself hasn't - simple, beautiful, art.

Interesting Finds

One of my interesting finds at one of Taiwan's Convenience Stores (my love during the 9 days trip because we kept stopping by to buy things and they had such an array of interesting goods).

It actually means that "If you eat M&Ms before exams, good things will happen (Fa Sheng in Chinese)", but the slogan provider cheekily twisted it to a similiar sounding: "If you eat M&Ms before exams, good things will peanuts (Hua Sheng)"

No offence to the Taiwanese, but I found this pretty cute and rather amusing not simply because it reflects how some of the Taiwan have a more slanged Chinese, but because it reflects Taiwan's unique "character"/"culture".

Accomodation: My Love

We were rushing half the time and so whenever we got to an accomodation I thought I could just hug the thing. I stayed in 7 different accomodations and this gave me a brilliant array of various hotels/resorts and their personalities. This resort we stayed in on our fourth night - my dream resort with wooden houses on the lake - interestingly left out 104 & 204 as their room numbers.

My room, the first room of 101.

~TO BE CONTINUED~

I need a breakthrough.

2008-06-22T22:11:00.007+08:00

Before I go on the usual post of how my holiday (in Taiwan) went, I shall now declare a change in the course of my life. :) I'm surprised myself that I'm declaring it here, but I found it something that I wanted to share with the world.

I have been basing my confidence and my life on something that was dependant, somewhat, on others. I had based it on my love for others, my extraordinary ability to see beyond their actions to delve deep to what's important in their hearts. I did it perfectly with strangers, classmates even, but not those close to me, including myself. I could change my perception and even my actions of strangers easily, but with my life and my family I still went on with my conservative, defensive, somewhat arrogant style. And the closest encounters don't lie.

One sentence - I have no life. I'm "trying hard" or rather planning hard to get the life I want, but I never ran hard for it. I show to outsiders an eventful planning & organising, but ultimately when the crux comes to me to show what I've got I screw up the chance. Then I place an excuse that I'm in the transition stage, but actually I've never really stood up and fought all I can, bruises and all.

I claimed that I'm all heart, that I loved myself and others, but it was quite about me & my life and how it was going to progress in the direction such that MY philosophy would be to care about others. But out of 10, 8 of the times I never really dared to show my care and concern. I never commited to any interests, anything, for fear of loss so as to gain. I shaped them, I said that I'll be this this this and do that that that but deep down inside I never worked hard for it.

So there. I'm going to shape myself. And then I'll talk about shaping others into my life.
I DARE MYSELF TO BE ME.
I DARE MYSELF TO DO THINGS FOR MYSELF.
I DARE MYSELF TO LOVE ME FOR WHO I AM.

I LIVE FOR MYSELF AND MY DREAMS.

This is the life...

2008-06-03T11:03:00.008+08:00

I probrably should just declare this a photoblog. xDD But I shan't :P.

More photos of my beautiful school:

Taken while walking to my bus stop (and half destroyed by the blue bag I didn't notice xD):

It actually looks scenic if you look at it from the sky and you take in the walkway. On top of that, the winding expressway makes it look half-country like. :D Yes, Singapore has beautiful scenery of her own, perhaps not best reflected by my pictures (I am after all, am amateur), but my eyes know of it.

Taken from an overhead bridge, a myriad of bright, lush colours:

And me playing with light halfway through revision (:p) :

Lastly, the quiche we baked, a.k.a Baking Fiesta Product #4! My family has sparked a newfound interest in baking recently (especially my mum) so we've been baking for the past few weeks (with help from CC lessons, hehe). We've made Chiffon Cake, Egg Tarts, Almond Cake (our version had a very strong nutty flavour) and Quiche Lorraine (pictures below).

And as the old saying goes, they may not be the best, but it's our bakes, so I'm very proud of them. :) (That we actually didn't burn the whole thing, but then again I'm the only one with no prior foundation, ehehe.)

In Memory

2008-05-25T20:37:00.002+08:00

Hope.
It's there with every sunrise.
Stay strong, keep your loved ones in your heart.
Wipe your tears, continue their legacy.
Hope.
I wish for you to stand strong again,
To laugh once again,
To dream once again,
and to live your life with even more love.
Hope.
It's in the beauty of the world.

Happy Mum's Day! :D

2008-05-14T10:34:00.007+08:00

So, the piles and piles of assignments that have been drowning me for the past few weeks have finally stopped coming, so I'll like to take this gleeful little break to post on what I did for...

Mother's Day!

So this year, I decided to go all out to make it a little more special for my mum - a cake and a heartleft present.

Haha, though this cake looks very homemade, it was actually a Strawberry Chilleed Cheescake (yum) from Secret Recipe! (I hope the staff had a fun time decorating it. ^_^)

I actually like the homemade feel, and it did taste light and lovely... until I realised I had bought too large a cake full of cheese and so the family of 5 of us had to struggle to finish it across the days. -_-" There's still a few slices left in the fridge. O_O

It's okay, I learn from these things.

And my brother and I chipped in to buy 2 books as a combined Father's Day and Mother's Day present:

Two travel books on the 100 most beautiful ancient cities in the world (e.g. Greece, Rome) and the 100 most beautiful towns in China. No, it wasn't inspired by my course (of study), but by a magazine or the newspaper that actually suggested "1000 places to see before you die" as a present.

My mum did mention that she wanted to travel (before and) after she retires, so this book stood out as a perfect gift to me, complete with Chinese text that they both understand best. :D

So, though the cake wasn't of the right size (XD), we had a very special and fun Mother's Day this year. I must admit that I was glad my parents were impressed with my selection of gifts and that they liked it. :) What I felt I took away from this day was not only just a closer bond with my family, but I was proud of myself for having put in the effort and for coming up with something simple, heartwarming and practical.

All it takes is the thought and the heart to spark a heartwarming celebration.

All going well...

2008-04-24T11:04:00.005+08:00

The past 3 days (1st 3 days of my Polytechnic education & life) have gone pretty smoothly, though of course I'm still a freshie that's blur about a lot of things. xDD Like places, for example. Should dine more outside of Business School, though there's still many more dishes I want to try! :D And our drinks are cheap. xDD

Things move fast in the mordern world and at the poly. We have a CCA fair no short of 3 days after school opens, and yesterday I had a half-headache trying to "shortlist" (haha) potential CCAs. :) I have absolute faith in my commitment and responsbility but I want to pick something that I can contribute and will enjoy contributing to. :)

This Friday/ Next Week:
Storm Jupiter Cafe.
Storm Mensa. xDD
Sign up for CCA trials. (There's too many. o_O)
Go for them! xDD
Storm even more levels and sections of the library (my Garfield collection!)

And I know there's someplace I can get sushi...

And so the excitement ensues.

I shall better find my balance along this journey to grow...

(And about the picture): Haha, I thought I wasn't going to be able to get the ball to the centre, but I perservered (and shook the case a lot). xDD

More Pictures:

School Orientation

Taken at the Temasek Olympiad, where Business School won and also clinched overall champion. :) Thanks to all the participants & our dear SLs for their hard work (and our seniors who showed skill in the dragonboating segment). Hopefully our cheers (abet soft from our weary selves) helped in this success (my poor poor throat X.X).

Few pictures in the heat of the competition.

And images of my lovely campus:

The Business Park Canteen

The Child's Touch

2008-04-02T07:01:00.000+08:00

My parents and I went to Pulau Kukup, Malaysia last Saturday, and I was glad for the chance to be in such a back-to-basics, simple and laid-back place for 2 days to explore and be part of their close-to-nature and simple lifestyles. :D It could be said to have the child's touch - though there are some developments in the area, the people in their kampong stilt houses (perhaps the first time I saw them in my life, and they were architecture masterpieces in their own way) there were generally easily contented. Though I admire them, I don't envy them for their lifestyle because I'm a big city girl in that kind of way.

My only regret was that I was too caught up with taking pictures with my camphone (1st holiday I had the chance to experiment with my own camera) that I didn't interact more with the locals and better appreciate their lifestyle. I guess that's a drawback of short-term tourism, but still having such world knowledge and unique experience is a sensation that only travel can bring. Anyways, it was a trip like no other...

Pictures are needed in times like these.

Plus: My FIRST EVER PARANOMA - with overlapping of images... o_O But it was a good try. :D

And the fourth, much better, though still shaky.

Having fun with my camphone

2008-03-08T03:53:00.000+08:00

:D

Hoho, thou's ze proud member of Temasek Poly!
TPEEEEE!! *squeals*
See how hyper it gets me? xDDD
Yep, and back to myself... I'm in TP. Yepps.

A drawing I did! :D Was trying to learn anime from an anime drawing book and ended up drawing anime animals instead (though mine doesn't exactly look like one).
Credits: "Manga Secrets by Lea Hernandez in which I learnt how to draw (or quite copied) the mouse from.
P.S. (I don't love you, btw): This is supposed to be a restaurant serving wine. Sorry, I was quite lazy to rotate it without my Adobe on my laptop.

Getting in touch with nature... the flowery drop of a petal...

Okay, now to find a title for this majestically simple picture of mine.

Here's why I should be in marketing (but I'm not going to, anyways):
1) How tears can break free and transform into a petal's beauty.
2) Beautiful Disaster.
3) Love triumphs all.

And the list goes tututrain on. o_O

Good to Know

2008-03-06T19:00:00.000+08:00

I had another reflective talk with my mother yesterday, and she always manages to get me thinking about things that I have missed out on or haven't had the experience of. That's why I love and respect her so much, she's been there to support me (and so well, because she's very capable of managing her own life) in my journey to grow up this year or so. :D

Another thing I would like to touch on. Different parents have different ways of expressing their love. My mum does so through working very hard at work and lending a listening ear & helping hand to us as and when she is free. She's so formidable that she can work and return home still friendly, still smiling and eveready to help us with our own challenges. My dad does it in a very open manner, greeting us cheerfully the minute he gets home, giving that warm hug and calling us muchos just to hear about what's going on at home and what we're doing (though we take it for granted, it's very courageous to do it everyday without fail despite [at least, my] less-than-appreciate replies (I am going to stop this, yes). :D My reasoning is that parents can express their love through concern with our studies, though doing their work well, through their constant reminders that we see as nags for us to take charge of our life. Many a time these are probably not where we want their love for us to show, possibly many of us want it in the form of encouragement and constant reminder of their love for who we are inside and not on paper and grades, but our parents are humans after all, and sometimes to do so takes a lot of courage or (as with many Singaporean parents), they want the best future and present for their child, so they work hard and show concern towards our studies to express their love.

We, as their beloved children must learn to accept and appreciate the different ways and means they love us and learn to appreciate that having gone through more harsh and difficult times than us, what they feel is important for us such as education and money (at least, for a comfortable life) are what we highly take for granted. We must learn to redirect these love to ourselves. We must ask ourselves - have I been taking charge of my life (so as not to make them worry)? Most importantly, ask oneself - have I been giving or returning that open gesture of love? Though parents love their child unconditionally, perhaps to start with oneself's open appreciation of their actions will cause them to be open to oneself too. :D

So there, done on "Love and Family". Now back to what my mother and I were discussing.
About my virtues that are shown at work. I sincerely thank her for pointing these out - because my sudden spurt-returns of low self-esteem was starting to dilute my confidence and I was about to wallow in despair of forever losing many good traits - okay you get the idea. o_O

1. I am PUNCTUAL! I get a gold star!
Must strengthen this strength. It's getting quite inconsistent lately.

2. I am LOYAL AND COMMITED AND PASSIONATE!
Also very inconsistent, but I don't deny this (even my friend says this - and in my first job month it probably even went overboard - I was advertising it to nearly everyone I knew. xDD). Mostly happens at the beginning of my job experience where my heart isn't so crushed by hurtful criticisms yet. xDD That's why I NEED to learn to be stronger - I can't have this draining off everytime I get a criticism. Wohh.

HIYAAH! I am a diamond! Nonone criticism cut past me!
Sorry it's one of those fun moments of the day. :P

3. I am WILLING TO LEARN!
Also at the beginning only. Okay, okay, just kidding, I need to rescrew the current complacent myself a little. My mother knows that I knew where my limits were (as in what ability I have), and I was willing to upgrade these abilities and learn from others to bring out the best job and service I can give.

I feel that sometimes humans need to turn themselves into a white piece of paper and start from scratch so they can absorb and accept more views like a sponge. After working for so long, this is something that I'm glad I've learnt that one cannot gain with just a few weeks or a month of work. Sometimes we feel we've reached some peak and we can stop, we get bored, we think about climbing down to scale that mountain that we think is higher but we never look up and realise we are only at a cutting of the slope. So there.

I am ACTUALLY A QUICK LEARNER WITH EYES VERY BIG WIDE OPEN OKAY (sorry for that spurt of Singlish - Singaporean slang English)! So I must show it consistently! xD

And that is all!
I am a diamond!
And so are YEW! ^_-

Dad's Special Day

2008-02-28T19:58:00.000+08:00

Today was my father's birthday. Sadly, I don't know his exact age - it seems we tend to overlook such things once people age. Though sometimes my parents, too, forget my exact age, we are still a bonded family with fond connection that sometimes, need some look beyond what's physical and between the lines. We remember each other's birthday and we all play a part, with my brother putting in quite a significant effort in making today special. So though we've lost count of our dad's age (and mum's too O_O), we still love each other and him very much to want to celebrate well and take the chance to send him love in a more open manner. xDD

I must stop taking my dad's everyday expressions for love granted though. He expresses his love so openly that I admire him for the courage not many may have. So I should too, openly send and constantly remind myself about my admiration, love and concern for him.

I'm sure we're all proud of our dads in our own way, so if it's still hidden within ourselves, perhaps it's time to let him hear our appreciation out loud (perhaps with a megaphone, but just kidding XD) or have him feel it with or direct actions - whip up a simple meal or get him the latest issue of his favourite watches or golf magazines. It'll most certainly put love in the air and warm his heart. :D

Techno Struggle

2008-02-27T05:24:00.000+08:00

Sorry that I'm actually posting this on my Wordpress Blog itself - but I realised that I cannot really blog the way I want in Wordpress.

Not entirely because of the formality of Wordpress as a blogging tool, but also because I've set out this blog to be that way. It must be reflective, it must be comprehensive, there should be depth... of course as a person who wants to reflect and share this isn't invalid but having them as solid book rules are a little too much. I can't exactly breathe and be myself. Blogging should be fun and informal - occasionally serious and reflective - but I don't want to have that feeling that I have to do that all the time.

Plus, I'm sorry, but Wordpress' uncustomisability really really frustrates me much.
I may be moving out soon - to somewhere which breathes more formality, flexbility and informality at the same time.
I'm not criticising Wordpress completely though. It still works wonderfully & professionally as my dear site management tool. :P

6 Ways to Enjoy...

2008-02-26T17:43:00.000+08:00

ICE-CREAM!

Note: The images below are courtesy of the lovely photographers at sxc.hu and the lovely clipart makers at JGoode. They are to bring out the general joys and thoughts on ice-cream & are not meant to (and should not) represent Andersen's or Andersen's products in any manner.

Cheers!

Cartoon the flavour(s) of your day!

Bring coloured spoons (or ice-cream sticks) for everyone in the family - and to mix-and-match with flavours.

Share it with the colleague/friend that you haven't been speaking to since last week. Make sure he/she can take it.

Share it with the colleague/friend that you have known since last year and beyond. Make sure he/she can take it.

Give one to the person you love who's holding a frown...

And watch it turn into a beeautiful smile! (Just like the ice-cream!)

The Pledge of Independence

2008-02-17T19:51:00.000+08:00

My brother is going to Melbourne for further studies today. I'm not getting all emotional about it; he isn't leaving forever, but instead it's interesting seeing him pack and all the documents that had to be prepared were quite substantial. Hohoho. And to think 3 years later that person is likely to be me.

But before that...my resolve to become an INDEPENDENT PEOPLE PERSON. This starts today.
Everything related to me is to be taken back to my responsibility range, bit by bit: e.g. certain chores, pet care, self-development, finances, mature thinking and problem-solving, etc. :D

Finances is done, self-development is done, while the rest shall start from today. :D

Looking back, I think I've actually neglected my success in these two areas. Though my finance management is far from disclipined and mature, I haven't had any major problems (though that was due to some compromise in crucial areas) and I'm very sure with my new experience and foresight March is going to be even better finance-wise. As for self-development, I've found resolve and good planning to pay the fees with my own savings and paycheck, which is an amazing feat, but I've still yet to actually disclipine myself to attend the lessons itself with resolve. Aye, Aye, there's always factors to improve on.

Though I CAN'TWAITCAN'TWAITCAN'TWAIT to start my Temasek Education and go all out to reach my potential in studies and talent devlopment, I'm going to take this last 1&1/2 months in Andersen's to GO ALL OUT! Yes, my boss is gonna hear me. Woohoo.

Telephone Skills, check. Service Professionalism (knowledgeable, fast, calm, confident), gearing up for improvement. Backstage-wise: You bet it's gonna be beautiful. :D

Goals:
- 1 skillfully handled telephone conversation
- ALL SERVICES HANDLED PROFESSIONALLY (Posture, Conversations)
- Sensible Hygiene Conditions, CLEANNNN SPARKLING: every possible visual corner of Andersen's stall try to clean at least once [per week/2 weeks - for more tricky and less visualable areas]
- Fast Service (by last 1/2 month)
- All Backstage Work (cone dipping, milkshake making, cone scooping, done CONSISTENTLY and BEAUTIFULLY, not OK-WE-NEED-TO-RUSH-THIS-PASS-CAN-ALREADY manner)
- Coordinating of cone shape --> big circle. :D
-Handphone Availability. A PRO keeps herself available at the quickest moment. Ahem.
- NO MORE STORYBOOK READING. GOT A LOT OF TIME RIGHT? Mop, Wipe, Skills Upgrading! :P Treasure every minute to self improve.

The Decree with regards to Scoop Weighing:

Frankly, this is something I really don't like to do, but I know that to achieve a most accurate weight and consistently produce that weight of ice-cream this has to be done. :D I'm very sorry, customers, maybe this'll not exactly make your day or your ice-cream experience but I OFFICIALLY DECREE IT AS MY MUST. :D Of course, I'll also try to maintain that consistency of scooping so it need not be done every time. ^_^

The Day of Love

2008-02-15T08:37:00.000+08:00

As quoted from Michelle Lim, my bestest friend.

The day of love never felt more special to me before than today. This was the first time in ages I could really let go, enjoy and be myself. Thanks to my lovely friends very much, though I'm not going to parade my gifts here because they're heartfelt. Thank you!

And now that I've watched all 3 CNY movies, it's time to give a short review.
Note: This is merely personal critique. No offence to anyone and if you can find another value in the films, watch it your way.
There will be MANY spoilers. Please refrain from reading it if you want the best take of the movie. Best viewed after the movie where you have your own views.

NUMBER 3: Ah Long Pte Ltd
I've been very critical of the film when telling my friends about it, but I have to admit, though Ah Long mostly had really no substance or reasonably good storyline in the plot, there were parts that I found of substance - SPOILER - LINKS TO ENDING. It did reflect how a person could (SPOILER, WARNING) change so drastically after a sudden tragic event and yet, still have a part of her that could reach out to relate to others and be compassionate with them. That was one of the only enjoyments of the show - to see a many-dimensional character that we often overlook to notice in society, and yet is in every one of us. Maybe it's because I've quite recognised this sometime ago, it wasn't exactly a learning experience for me, but nonethless I was very glad it was put on screen with such a (facts) popular show to relate this message. :D

Also, the whole portrayal of the main Ah Long characters as 3 dimensional characters in certain scenes rather than complete ruthless villans (e.g. SPOILER the ending where they showed their love for their family and the scene where Li Hua saw what some Ah Longs ruthlessly did on TV and decided to use non-violence tactics in her gang) shows that Director Neo and his crew did atttempt to relate certain important messages in their show and succeeded at some.

Other than that, I make and take away no head, no tail and no body of the show. The violence was overly gory for me to bear and many a time quite unnecassarily OVERLY gory. Moreover, there's no relation (I'm sure I need not explain this, it's targeted at Malayan audiences) and I'm ultraly sorry, but I was so annoyed with the film as compared with the many other wonderful films that Jack Neo had produced, that I was rolling my eyes nearly half the time across the show at childish jokes which I found of absoultely no substance and other ridiculous storylines. What made it worse was the length of the movie. Watching Jack's other shows, I thought he was good at cutting it precisely at the moment so as not to drag it too long for viewers to crinch, but it turns out I could find nothing of that in Ah Long. The thing that was possibly good about the whole show was that perhaps it was not predictable, possibly only because that was not what I expected from a Jack Neo film. Anyway, anyhow, though the storyline made sense and could survive perhaps practically, it was not presented well and even with itself, could not carry the show or sparkle (and that is important for a film).

I go into the theatre for fun, enjoyment and takeaway moments or lessons. I'm afraid Ah Long failed quite terribly at that, even in the theatre itself. The trailer with fast packed scene-changing is quite misleading.

Stars: 2 and a half

NUMBER 2: CJ7

It might be shocking why the movie that got the top spot during the CNY box office is ranked second in my list.
Simple.
THE TRAILER (THEATERICAL, SAYING THAT HE IS TOO HANDSOME) SPOILED THE PART AFTER HE DIED AND I COULDN'T CRY!!!
*wails* ~ <-- doesn't count, my emotions didn't flow in the show.

Perhaps because it was my first movie, and I was expecting more laughs from Director Stephen Chow.
But on the whole, I was quite an out of this world movie with its heartwarming moments and a very interesting plot, so there was sufficient enjoyment, hohoho.

And I understand his intensions of wanting to let his audience cry instead - that would be a good balance and an artistan has got to try different mediums as a challenge. My parents were definitely touched, but - I DIDN'T CRY!!!! -_-"

But it definitely left me with an never-before informative and art-imitates-life insight of the living and working conditions of low-income families of not just China, but the world. The ending was skillfully, beautifully and cutefully done.

I only have one lament - CAN'T IT STRETCH LONGER SO WE COULD ENJOY MORE? xDD
Oh well, good things are short and sweet.

Stars: 3 and a 3/4!! (no emotions relation because of the huge spoiler, but beautiful and enjoyable)

NUMBER 1: Kung Fu Dunk

NUMBER 1 (imitates 933 radio broadcast station's announcing of the champion on their "Most popularly requested song" chart)!

And KFD deserves it, from beginning to end. Smart, heartwarming and funny. The only CNY movie that glued me to the screen (perhaps because I was upfront, but also because of the SUPER DARNED *cough, sorry* LAMELY WHY-AM-I-LAUGHING HILARIOUS storyline)!

Of course, perhaps it may seem that relating best to me as a youngster may be a plus point, be not only is KFD the only movie that made me laugh and cry (laughs multipily, cry once, and no halpless sobs though some parts were lame - at least they were somewhat funny). Jay Chou seemed to be linked in my brain somewhat to Christopher Lee, Singapore actor, but whether or not, he sure *coughs again* made me laugh with him in it (NOT BECAUSE I'M A ELECTRIC FAN, GOODNESS) but because of his ironical super stardom clashing with the show. Though you naturally take him for Jay Chou in the show, it does seperate occasionally from his character, and even if it doesn't it's such a whole LOT OF FUN that really I don't care :P

Plus, though my friend was lamenting that many parts were fake, IT IS FAKE. o_O But it does send out messages in a very vibrant, light-hearted manner and the script had enjoyable delectable substance and is not just kungfu and dunks - it explores themes: love, family, friends, sport quite beautifully. It relates moments that though (some) may be used and known, can touch viewers over and over again, and again in this show.

Most important (YESH, THIS IS A CNY REVIEW), it fits the let-go, have fun and get-together atmosphere of CNY best.

The (SPOILER HUGE) time machine part did come across to me as (PLEASE-THIS CAN'T-HAPPEN-RELISTICALLY-SO-WHY-DO-MOVIE-CREWS-KEEP-USING-IT) but at least it was used in an accounted-for manner and they did deserve it, there was a message and IT IS A SHOW. So there. Same for CJ7.

The only lament I have is - WHY DID IT END SO FAST? SOBBBS.
And pleeeeeeeeeeeease, the theme song. OFF WITH TOFU'S HEAD, DOWN WITH TOFU. *cough* Nonsense. :P

Stars: 4.5 (hoho, if not for the fast ending (though still acceptable) & how the tofu song haunted me. -_-")

The Andersens’ who stole the Weekend before CNY

2008-02-03T19:38:00.000+08:00

Hohoho, perhaps I didn't mention this earlier: while waiting for my entry into Temasek Polytechnic I'm working at Andersens' of Denmark. ^_^ I shall post about this very intriguing and fulfilling (possibly cliche, but it's because it's truly that way) experience sometime later but now, the most important thing.

Why the title of this post is: "The Andersens' whole stole the Weekend before CNY - literally. Today's my off day, asked back to work. End of information.

Moreover, that is to emphasize the fact that CHINESE NEW YEAR IS HERE!
Coming soon to all reunion dinners near you. :P

It really felt as though Chinese New Year last year happened only yesterday - where I was fussing over wanting to have large quantities of quality Pineapple Tarts (oh the words! xD), gathering angpows (okay, I'm not practical, it's just a nice tradition) and wolfing down CNY goodies at my relatives' houses. Hoho.

Here's a personal thought on visiting relatives Chinese New Year: Some of us youngsters might feel awkward at visiting relatives that we sometimes only do once per year (yes, it's a shame, though it's usually more distant relatives) but if we look at it in this manner: we only have the chance to meet once per year, so why not meet and leave on a good note? ^_^ There has got to be something to say - we're related after all. Ask about their health, their happenings, tell them about yours or just smiles will suffice. That way we can have a good impression on each other for the entire year and enjoy CNY even more...isn't it a blessing?

I'll make a sincere effort to care more this year. Yesh.

The Chinese New Year MUST-TRY goodies on Angela's chart: (personal biased opinions xDD)

PINEAPPLE TARTS TOP ALL. The sweet chewy taste of the pineapple, the crunchy and biscuit-y tart and how they both wildly and mildly blend together for perfection. OW.

Where you can find some unique, tasty and innovate pineapple tarts:

( 大自然素食 ) Nature Vegetarian Delights
Address: No. 37, Teck Chye Terrace, Singapore 545734
Location: East Area - Restaurant – Paya Lebar
Click here for more info

Note: The pineapple tarts I ate were bought from last year for last year. It is possible that they might not be selling any this year, so it's best to call to check first. :) If I manage to secure some again this year, I'll update.

Also: Check out Makansutra's rating on the various bakery's Chinese New Year goodies to know where to source for them. Click Here.

Also: How well do we know our Chinese New Year customs? Check this page out to find out more on the Togetherness Tray, Plum Blossoms (equivalent to Christmas trees during Christmas where we hang up angpows and angpow-folded fish and cranes instead) and more.

Hey, ho!

2008-01-27T06:38:00.000+08:00

Beautiful 7 honours the 7 wonders of the world.

"To See the red and orange sunset
To Hear the oranges exchanged with "Gong Xi Fa Cai"
To Taste the simple sweetness of bananas
To Smell the fresh air under the blue sky
To Feel the emotions that decorates the Earth
To Laugh with the pink of health
To Love others regardless of differences
- appreciate both the mysterious deep purple and the scent of fragrant and simple lavender."
+ "to enjoy life, to keep it simple", to "cherish opportunities" & also honour the colours and diversity of life. ^_^

Life is beautiful.

I shall spare myself and everyone on the details of how this blog is new and all, but I must post about the reason I created this blog. It's not to reflect - I have my journal, not exactly to tell the world about myself and not exactly not so either. I'm here to share my life, the lessons I've learnt (and to improve my English, hehe), my endeavors so that you can laugh, cry and perhaps grow with me from them. Perhaps it's appropriate that I do give some sort of an introduction on myself (this is something that many bloggers overlook nowadays) so you will know if my (hoho, interesting) life journeys can relate to you in any way.

I'm Angela, a growing 16 year old, a Singaporean (wooh~) and proud of my Asian heritage (though, of course, that's not to say arrogant or overbearing) . As though preparing for job interview: I'm compassionate, passionate, trustworthy, good-natured, growing to be very responsible, appreciates the simple (yes, the truly free things) things in life, still learning to be sensitive and trying to be a bit more wild and learning to enjoy & cherish life. Hoho. I'm still trying to have more trust in myself and others and be strong and true towards myself. Also, I'm trying to prevent myself from falling into the cliff of procrastination as in before. -_-"

I'm a more emotional person growing practical, and doing my best to take a step a time towards maturity. I've struggled through quite an immature stage of my life where even though I seemed like a typical student that, though was constantly procrastinating (sorry, dearest teachers), was generally stable and had no problematic behaviour. However, I constantly faced many problems with my relationships with other students in school (most probably due to my insensitivity and immaturity), till in my last year of secondary education, a few incidents that smacked the need to grow up straight in my face took my by storm and I became the stronger me today.

I'm still learning, and my life story cannot be explained in a short paragraph, but for now I shall concentrate on the present and my future. My past can be of help in the future (I plan to write a book on my life by the third year of my Polytechnic Education - that's one of my projects on self-improvement and development.) :)

Going back to who I am, I have perfectionist ways I'm trying to grow out of, I'm still trying to appreciate the worth and value in everyone and learning how to grow and love myself and others. I am fond of music (am currently learning piano from a friend) and even more fond of the people around me- my wonderful and beloved family, my cherished friends whom I'm grateful to for appreciating me for who I am even at a time where many others gave up on me. As I have grown to appreciate this bond between people and I have since young been blessed with a compassionate heart, I'm going to pursue people-orientated jobs in tourism and psychology to serve others with my gifts. :)

And lastly, I'm going to a Polytechnic, so if you're a Singaporean secondary student who needs some insight, feel free to browse through.

My blogging style can be very casual, perhaps at times very much directed to people close to me and may even be very Singaporean-based. However, most of the time I would like things to be shared extensively such that it'll be directed at no one in particular with a fun tone. :) So do not be afraid if you do not get some of my inside jokes and languages used (I have to have a personal spark somewhere), but instead join in with the "masses posts" and leave a comment to share! :) The more people sharing the merrier! :)

Warning: Future formats may much less serious and formal as this post. xD Lalaladedum~ And pictures may be included, because I believe blogging, reading and sharing should be a fun experience!

One last point I must make, though I will be sharing quite some experiences here, it will not be often. I do value (& believe in) enjoying and experiencing my life very much (have to add the emphasis to make it clear). :) But I love sharing too, so look out for some inspiring updates on the way! Quality tops Quantity.

Looking forward to sharing! ^_^ Don't forget, comments are always welcome whether you want to share your viewpoints and experiences or comment on any other way on how my posts can relate to you! Thank you!~

Learning and growing,
Angela.